My Life Story
Day 17
by Justin Crombie
I blacked out. When I woke up, it was already game over. I couldn't sleep, I had the TV on all night on the Super Shopping Network channel, but I never took a look at it. I kept hearing Brigit's words over, and over, and over, and over, again. "I cared more about my past actions for an animal, than I did for anyone else", I hurt Elvira and Camilla was devastated. "I should've kept a low profile", from the very beginning.
All of this wouldn't have happened, if I just didn't show up. Mixology, it caused me to ruin lives... again - I got pissed off with myself. I wasn't happy with what I did, I started this, but I was unable to stop it. I was a monster. I wanted this all to have been a dream, or a nightmare, but it was all a reality. I wanted to enter an endless sleep.
I got up, and checked the time on my smartphone, it was the afternoon. I grabbed the bottle that I drank all night, and tried to finish it to the last drop, but there wasn't anything left. I tried to throw it, but I just couldn't. I went over to the mixology table to find another drink, to help me drown in my sorrows... but I never contain sorrows, or do I? It's been such a long time, that I had forgotten what it feels like.
I received a text message; it was from Matt. He said he heard the news, and that he didn't care what I did, since he'd somewhat been in the same position as me when he was younger - he's got to be joking. He said he had one last surprise for me, but it wasn't here yet, I just had to wait. Matt is full of surprises - literally. I had another text message, it was from Victoria Boxer that said to meet her at the bar.
I had already been drinking all night, so it was definitely a good idea not to drive, as I didn't have enough money, and that I was a bit frugal, I decided to walk there - or try to. I couldn't clear my mind, it was too packed. I didn't want to think about it anymore, I just wanted all of my thoughts to vanish, along with myself. I felt like throwing myself onto the road, but that would be an easy way out.
The thoughts, and memories, were still there, I felt sick, exactly like yesterday. I got out my smartphone, and began to look at information on Brigit's holiday resort, I should probably just accept the job offer. There's nothing else for me to do, all I do is wreck everything, but did I still have something to live for? Not anymore. I continued to drink, but it was only making me feel much worse.
Victoria finally showed up, even though that the news was out of there about me, and what I had done, I thought there was no way anyone was going to go near this bar. Somehow, there are still a few people here, either they didn't know about it, or it's Matt's celebrity status. Victoria greeted me, and told me to cheer up, but that was going to be impossible, she then bought us a couple of drinks.
She sat down next to me, as I stared down at the table, she said that there was nothing to worry about, everyone makes mistakes. She hasn't won me over, I didn't make mistakes, I made crimes. I was more pathetic than that guy at the park over a week ago. Victoria said I shouldn't worry about the past, and that I should only look forward to the future, but I've already been doing that, and it was almost working until I was interrupted.
I wanted to leave, I finally had enough, and she noticed. She said that I should just enjoy myself, and that the day had just begun. I closed my eyes wishing she'd leave, she let out a sigh and said to follow her, if I wasn't going to enjoy myself, she was going to help me.
I didn't feel like enjoying myself, but Victoria was very determined in trying to have fun. She dragged me to the elevator, and gave the signal to follow her in, but I couldn't move... she then grabbed my arm, and giggled as she pulled me into the elevator.
The pain was too much, I couldn't handle it anymore, it felt like I was going to explode.
I thought I was going to vomit at any second, even while in the elevator with Victoria. But all of a sudden, my feeling of sickness, gone... I just did it again... I can't stop what I started, but Victoria took advantage of me, but I took advantage of everyone else.
My mind went blank, but I didn't blackout, it was like it was suddenly deleting all of the data within my brain, as if I was about to be erased. I wanted it to happen, but was it an easy way out? As long as everyone else was happy, I didn't mind.
I started walking, but I didn't know where, as long as I was away from Bridgeport, I couldn't hurt anybody else, so as long as I was away from Bridgeport... the better.
As I dropped to the floor on my knees, I finally asked myself, why... why did I do this? I could have lived happily, or, I could have just fixed, what I had done... at the very beginning. I was guilty as charged, I was the one that hurt her first. I should have never started mixology in the first place.
Once again, I was being selfish, I let mixology take over my life, as I got too absorbed into the lifestyle. Picking up those glasses, was the biggest error I made, and along the way, I knew what I did wasn't a crime, it was a mistake. Something I always regretted doing, it hurt my best friend... my only, best friend.
I ran away. I just simply ran away from my mistake. We could have worked things out, but I chose the cowardly option. I broke my promise, I turned my back on her and ran away, I said that we'd be together forever. My pain of sickness gradually came back, but it wasn't the alcohol this time, it was the pain of loss... and after all of this time, and after all of these years, what I thought I had lost, appeared right in front of me.
Brooke...
I never thought I'd ever see her again, but why would she want to see me after what I did? I ruined her life. She kneeled down, greeted me and said that it's been a long time. I couldn't look at her, I just couldn't. She said that she saw my name in the paper, the day after the party, and said that she was a bit surprised that I had made the headlines. Apparently, Brooke was very pleased for me when she saw my name in the most recent paper.
Did she come all of the way here, just to tell me that? Brooke explained that she called the bar last night and wanted to contact me, I wasn't present at the time, but someone who was: Matt. She wanted to know where and when I'd be available, so Matt gave her my details, along with the bar address - just in case. Since I wasn't home, she went to the bar, but she saw me leaving and followed me here.
Brooke said she knows what has happened, including the stuff when I first arrived here, everyone knew as it was the talk of the town. In every building you walk into, it was immediately the first conversation. After a couple of minutes of nothing but the sound of nature around us, she asked if I would like to stay at a hotel for the night, to get away from the current affairs; I couldn't answer. Brooke let out a lamenting sigh, and said she knew this that would happen... I became, who I hated.
It happened all of the time, even when we were just kids, my mother would bring random male strangers to our house, and would just seduce them. Dad was either at work, or away. We didn't know what to do, we could have told dad, but he was already a troubled man, he didn't need more despair than what he already had. Brooke was lucky, Erika and I were the ones who had to suffer with it, constantly.
I was speechless, I didn't know how to react to it. When Brooke and Erika quietly went to her bedroom, they thought that it had affected me, mentally. It couldn't have affected Brooke, since she already had Paranoid Personality Disorder, so I thought it affected Erika, she was always shy, and couldn't talk to any other boys. One day, when this happened, I gazed into Brooke's eyes, and vowed, that I would never do this to her, and that I would always be there for her, forever.
We were teenagers, it was a school party that happened at the library. The teachers were disappointed that there weren't any mixologist, so I asked if I could be the official one of the night, to which they agreed, but only if I didn't cause any trouble. They kept their eye on me, but they weren't the only ones who kept their eye one.
I had never studied mixology before, and I got a bit cocky when flipping glasses, I was pretty decent. The drinks that everyone had, were mine, I got a bit too carried away and made quite a few, I don't think I should have. A couple of female classmates made their way to the mixology table and each took a drink, one of them began to compliment me on my skill, while the other stared at me, twirling her hair around her finger.
I was a bit clueless, so I thanked her and continued on with my next set of drinks, I didn't know that Brooke had been paying attention to the situation - very closely. As I was mixing ingredients, the two female classmates began whispering to each other, but it was inaudible to me, so I ignored it. When I slightly looked up, I noticed they were giggling, while look away - at Brooke?
The same one that complimented me, came back over to me, and started to talk to me while she playing with her earring. These two were up to something, but I was just a dumb kid, and didn't know what. She accidentally dropped the straw from her glass, and I left the table to pick it up for her, as she got down to also pick it back up, she grabbed my collar and pulled me closer, I was kissed on the lips before I knew it.
Brooke saw it happen. I was taken aback, and wiped my lips with my sleeve, I was tricked. I wanted to know why they did that, but I heard a noise, and when I looked over, Brooke was standing there... crying. And before I had a chance to explain anything, her PPD got the best of her...
I ran away. I just simply ran away from my mistake. We could have worked things out, but I chose the cowardly option. I was scared. I thought I could erase the pain of losing Brooke, but I only made it worse, by becoming, who I hated... and for the first time, in my entire life... I, actually cried...
I couldn't let her see me like this, I couldn't even raise my head. The only thing I could say, was that it was my fault. Brooke denied it, and said in a melancholic tone, that it was it her fault. She kissed the back of my head, as she stroked my hair. The last words, that I heard, before I finally broke down, were...
"I'm sorry..."
The End.
My Life Story
Day 16
by Justin Crombie
Thunder is inevitable. The worst time it can happen, is the day where you have a hangover.
Somehow, I've yet again managed to avoid a hangover myself, I don't know why. I looked over to the pile of clothes on the floor, and realized that during the drunken party, I let Olive wear my outfit, and I accidentally ripped it when she was trying to drag me over to the sofa. More thunder, I'm surprised it hasn't woken up the other three, they must've been really out of it.
I look over to the window, it rained all night and it still is. It's weird, I feel like I never had those beers, nor have anything wrong with me. I then turned my head to the beers on the floor, then felt sick, and quickly got up to take my mind off of them.
As I looked out of the window, I tried to think about what would happen to me, from here onwards. I'm the owner of my own bar, I'm going to become a father, and I didn't have a cool jacket anymore. There are a lot of predictions I can make, is it the outcome that matters? A good outcome, can often be incorrect. A bad outcome, can often be correct. Are the possibilities endless? Yes. Will the future come soon enough? Only if let yourself get the best of you.
Since I no longer had a cool jacket to wear, I had to settle with the boring shirt. I went downstairs to the kitchen, and got myself a fresh coffee, while making it, the thunder finally went further away; the lightning was a nice sight, though. As I look around Matt's house for the very first time, I don't think he needs to buy anything else, it looks like he's already bought the entire world - or perhaps universe.
Despite the rain, the man who brings the mail, who is usually called a mailman, arrives to bring the mail. He's a brave son of a bitch, and he's wearing shorts of all things, he's not as brave as me though, I'm wearing a shirt without a cool jacket. I finish the coffee, then go outside to grab the paper, I noticed that a picture of the bar was on the bottom of the front page.
Even though Matt is the co-owner, it's no surprise that his name went before mine, but it's all good, at least we made the headlines - again. Apparently, just after we left the bar last night, the old owner was given a farewell party, and quite a lot of people attended. I guess we were already too drunk to notice. I went back inside, and upstairs to the bedroom, I quietly made my way to the pile of clothes and grabbed my jacket. As I sneaked back to the door, I think I heard Victoria begin to snore - she sounded like a platypus.
It was noon, and I got back to the apartment, Camilla was sitting on the sofa.
I tried to hide the rip in my jacket, as I began to talk to her, but she was a bit quiet - maybe she found the rip. I apologized for being out for the entire night, actually, the entire day, right? I brought the paper with me and told her that I had good news, but she was still quiet. I then got a bit concerned with why she was acting like this, as she's never been like this before. I asked if something was wrong. There was.
"Bod passed away, yesterday evening..."
I was speechless. When those words came out of her mouth, I couldn't say anything. How did it happen? She didn't know. He was sleeping, peacefully, but he never woke up. I started to wonder, if it was my fault, and asked it out aloud, Camilla claimed it wasn't, and tried to defend me by saying that it was nobody's fault, but it might've been mine... I felt sick. The pain of loss, something I didn't want to feel again. I cared for Bod, but my selfishness took over.
I'm the only one to blame, I spent all day out of the apartment, trying to find a bar to buy. I could've been there for him, I could've prevented his death... my mind went blank. I couldn't think straight. Then I remembered, the vet, I should have taken him to the vet when we adopted him, Camilla tried to calm me down by hugging me; it started to work. The rain continued to fall, as the rain washed away Camilla's tears.
I was too enraged with myself... I was unable to cry.
We'd been at the graveyard for a while, causing Camilla to say that it was probably time to go back now; I couldn't reply. Camilla was already at the front gate, she was way ahead of me, I don't think I would've made it to the gate if it wasn't for her, as she dragged me to it. It was like I was child, not wanting to leave the carnival.
A raindrop went in my eye, and I finally became active again, I snapped out of my thoughts going on in my head and we both started walking back to the apartment. In the distance, Camilla noticed that Kirby Wise was with the female I met at The Plasma 501.
Kirby was holding an umbrella, trying to protect them both from the rain, but the other one looked pretty angry, and noticed us. Kirby was still as shy as ever, trying not to look at me. We walked over to them, while I gave a little wave.
I received a slap in return.
Nothing was said, it was literally hit-and-run. Camilla gasped, and got a bit scared, until they were out of sight. I don't know why it happened, it just did, out of nowhere. My head was already spinning, and now it feels like a permanent merry-go-round. Camilla asked if I was alright, but again, I couldn't reply. I'll find out the answer sooner rather than later.
We got back to the apartment, and Camilla told me to sit on the sofa. I did what she said, and I received a relaxing massage. It was good being with Camilla again, she used to help me out of tough situations, a lot, and I forgot just how much she cared for me. I made a definite note to self, to repay her for what she's done for me. I was, and still am, a bad servant.
I thanked her, as I got back up, I wanted to get out of the suit since it was completely drenched in rain. My head suddenly started to hurt when I walked to the bedroom door, Camilla asked me what the slap from earlier was about, but I just didn't know.
Suddenly, the apartment buzzer goes off, distracting Camilla from her own question. She went to answer it, but I was also distracted, my head felt as though someone was balancing cement blocks on my head.
Morrigan Hemlock was waiting patiently outside, as Camilla greeted her. Morrigan stated that she was sent here for me, I was invited to Brigit Hemlock's apartment.
Camilla told me about who it was, and what they wanted via the buzzer, while I was getting out of my suit. I went to the bathroom, and looked into the mirror. My head was still hurting, and I still couldn't let my anger go, it was my fault, no matter how many times Camilla says otherwise. If I just hadn't thought about myself for a single second, I could've taken him to the vet to get sorted out. He could still be alive, and well.
I eventually made my way downstairs, with Morrigan offering her condolences, due to Camilla telling her, I headed straight outside. There was no one in sight, just the sound of rain, flickering street lights, and various rooms of buildings being lit up.
When I was walking to my car, I couldn't remember where I was going to go. I just suddenly forgot. I had too much on my mind, at the time. It was until I got to the car door, I remembered, but questioned as to why "The Queen of Bridgeport Mixology" was waiting for me. It was probably best I just go now, since I'd get drenched in rain again, and I need to make a good first impression.
I'm glad I was told the address, because getting lost would've been easy. She lives on the other side of town, and I've never seen this area before, no wonder, since I'm very far away from home now. Morrigan travelled a long way, just to get me, almost like a role-playing game's quest.
I rang the apartment buzzer, and confirmed my arrival. "Enter" was all that was said. When I saw the apartment, I thought Camilla had been here. The magazines were piled up neatly, and the DVDs were stacked alphabetically. I hadn't seen her yet, but once I turned around the corner, she made her presence known.
There stood "The Queen", as the aura grew across the hall, those eyes pierced right through me. If you weren't scared before, you were now - I already was. I had to answer a few questions to confirm who I was. I got them all right, and she began to explain it was me here and not Matt. Matt?
Matt was the business partner between us, and since he was the one who wasn't the mixologist, it was me who was ordered here. It turns out, that she invited me here for a little competition. I wasn't in the mood, I didn't have other stuff to do, I just had other stuff on my mind. Of all the days for this to happen. She claimed she knew of me, back when Daisy Swizzle served me once.
I had completely forgotten about that. Eugi's. The first, and second bar I went to when I first arrived here. She mentioned that she is the owner of Eugi's, and said that Daisy talked about me. She then stopped talking, and asked me to step inside. I was very reluctant.
The rules were as follows. Each competitor makes three tray servings of beverages, using the given ingredients is optional. She never mentioned what the goal was, but there was no time limit, so we both started as quickly as we could.
I started, but I couldn't do it. I wanted to do it, but I remembered... the last time something relating to mixology happened, I took a selfish decision and caused him to pass away. I turned around, and was about to leave the room, until Brigit suddenly said aloud while she was still mixing drinks, that I shouldn't worry about Bod... he wouldn't want me to walk away from this opportunity.
How did Brigit... I couldn't think straight, again. I looked over to her, she was busy in mixing her second tray of drinks. I walked back over to my mixology table, the ingredients were untouched, and still fresh... and I knew I was going to regret this decision.
I desperately tried to free my mind, and put mixology in it. It started to work, but not that much. I began to catch up with her, I finished my first tray before she finished her second. It was lucky that there wasn't either a time limit, or a goal. This was like an endurance test, and to be honest, that's perfect. It was helping me gain a large amount of experience, and I thought about how this was helping towards the bar.
But then I again came to realize that this is what caused him to pass away... I started running out of energy, I couldn't continue any longer. We were both on our last tray, only one or two drinks away from completion. I accidentally dropped an ice cube on the floor after I tried to throw one into the glass, I got down to grab it, but was going to just grab a liquor sweet that I put in my pocket before leaving to come here, until I noticed something sticking out of the pocket.
It was a piece of light brown hair. Light brown. Camilla has dark brown hair. This isn't hair, it's fur. Dog fur. And there's only one dog I know who had light brown fur. I knew I didn't need to unnecessarily cheat, I knew that this last drink was necessarily dedicated to Bod. This one, was for my best buddy.
We had both finished, and it felt like it had been a long time since we started. Her drinks were guaranteed perfection, but this wasn't about her's, this was about mine. She congratulated me on completing the challenge, and said the drinks looked decent, but mentioned that it's quality that matters.
She grabbed one from each tray serving and drank them individually. Even though there wasn't a goal, the wait was nerve-racking, and the silence wasn't definitely not helping. After drinking each of the servings, she was about to reveal her final verdict.
Brigit shook my hand, and I was officially declared "The King of Bridgeport Mixology". She deemed me as her successor, as the King or Queen are supposed to hold these sort of private contests, to decide the new mixologist heir of Bridgeport. With the help of Bod, we dethroned her.
That wasn't all, she then said that she'd need an answer by the end of the week, as the offer wouldn't be permanently available. Obviously I'm confused, and she offered me a trip to her holiday resort. I wondered why this was happening all of a sudden, and the confusion then changed completely, when she then stated that she was offering me a job at her holiday resort.
She said not to answer now, but give her a call, or somehow to let her know. She then allowed me to leave her apartment, just before walking out of the door, she said she found it fascinating that I cared more about my past actions for an animal, than I did for anyone else, especially the child-bearer, and that I should've kept a low profile. How does Brigit... I looked at her; I didn't know how to react. She stared at me, with disdain - the same look when I first arrived.
As quickly as I could, I ran down the hallway, dodging her furniture, trying to avoid causing damage to anything. I burst through the apartment door, and desperately pressed the elevator button. They never work when you need them to. I checked my watch, while shouting due to the slowness of the elevator. I got sick and tired, and noticed that there were actually stairs, cleverly hidden around the corner.
I tried to piece together what Brigit was saying, but I couldn't think properly, I was too busy concentrating on not trying to fall down the stairs.
The sun was slowly descending during the drive back, her house really was far from mine. I had no idea how long the session lasted, but that's not something I should be worrying about. I began to think about what she meant. Child-bearer, that would be Elvira, I drove as quickly as I could to her apartment.
I was lucky I didn't go over the speed limit, before I arrived at her apartment. I got out, and ran through the door... I rang the buzzer.
But there wasn't an answer.
Elvira ignored whatever I was saying, I told that I had some good news, but that didn't work, either. I was being very patient regarding this situation, but I just felt like giving up, but I didn't want to. I added that this good news is what could help our life and future together.
That caused her to finally come down.
I apologized for not keeping in contact for a whole day, and had to tell her that Bod had passed away, and then Morrigan Hemlock visited, who said that Brigit had invited me to her apartment, and we forced to do a mixology session.
I confirmed that I did buy a bar, I joked to her that the good luck she wished for me worked, because it was something special that day. I then told her of this good news, that I mentioned earlier, that I was offered a job at a holiday resort, and that this could change our lives.
She swiftly turned around to me, and gave me the same disdain look that Brigit gave me. I stood still, looking like I just saw a ghost; I wanted to make sure that time didn't stand still. She continued to look at me, and finally began to talk. "You'd better have a damn good explanation." I asked her what she meant, but it was obvious what she meant. She said not to play dumb with her, after all we had been through together, this is how I treat her?
Apparently, during the old owner's farewell party of the Bridgeport Sports Zone bar, all of the females that I've had relations with, met at that party. Everything was fine, it wasn't so bad, until Tiara Angelista showed up. She was suddenly carrying a baby, Katrina went over to greet her and see the baby, when she asked who the father was, the answer caused Katrina to tell practically everyone at the party.
I was already a father. I was speechless. I didn't know what to do. Now that I think about it, it only happened because of me being an idiot, by getting drunk. I had kissed Elvira for the first time, and I quickly left her apartment. It was all a mistake. I then calmed down, and said to Elvira that I still loved her, and that this was al-
Elvira made it perfectly clear, that she never wanted to see me again. She said that I should just accept the holiday resort job offer, and to never come back here again, as well.
I slowly walked through the doors back to my car. As I got in my car, I never turned my head to see what was happening, I drove straight back to my place.
It was already very dark outside, and when I got back, Morrigan was still here, but was about to leave. Before she left, she whispered "sorry" into my ear.
I wasn't expecting a welcome back, I wasn't expecting any good reception, either. Camilla was crying, but I just couldn't look. Morrigan had told her everything.
Camilla asked why I would do these things, to the person I loved. She said that she tried to desperately hold in her feelings for me, and said that she shouldn't have had them from the start, since she was a butler... she then said that she loved me, but could no longer be a butler, to a scumbag.
And then she quit...
